Do you believe that for happiness to be a part of your life there is a bargaining game that you do to manifest happiness?
It can go like this....
you work really hard
you make yourself likeable
you are in the right relationship
you have your dream job
you fit in
you have nice stuff
you plan ahead
you are frugal
you stress to win
you sleep more
you sleep less
you eat well
you juggle your day life a champion
you will deserve what you are striving for
you are worth being
you will know your happiness
The if....then model of thinking and believing anchors our worth on how we act and react to the world around us and within us. It is the cause and effect programming that our upbringing and culture have instilled in us. Dare I say to even control us.
The practise of this mental model cements the idea that your worth is not tangible until you have proved yourself with effort, hard work and striving. Then happiness will follow.
When you stick to this belief, no matter how far you go, or how well you do there will always be the need to look for other ways to prove the if...then model for your life.
It can be a recurring cycle that keeps you just out of reach of that elusive happiness.
When you think if...then you are conditioned for surviving, scarcity - a definite block to happiness as part of your life. Happiness, contentment, worth doesn't thrive in the if...then model.
There is one strong way to break this mental model and that is the the power of gratitude.
There is immense power in gratitude, gratitude is like a magnet that attracts for your highest good. Gratitude raises your energy and centres you in the present.
Swap the if...then with I am thankful for who I am and where I am. Allow your life force to accept and expect.
Happiness will bubble up naturally.