Promoting a Healthy Self Esteem

Imagine you are sitting on a hill, looking out over a beautiful scene

Think about the last few days

  • Have you made a choice that you think could be better but you didn't because of the other person?
  • Have you stood up for yourself and taken responsibility?
  • Do you love, respect and trust yourself enough to have the courage to look at what you bring to this world?


  • How would your life change if you had a high powered healthy self esteem?

It takes a lot of self to recognise what you bring to this world and a lot of self to look at your shadow. 
Do you want to be someone who is upfront? 
Are you willing?

Here are some markers to help a healthy self esteem and in no particular order and it is a beginning. 

When you start, I know that you will seek out more because as you respect yourself, your self esteem will raise your standards and what you value will be clearer and defined.

1. Think of one area in your life you would be willing to change by the end of the day? That when you did, it would empower you. Hold to that. Keep it small and stick to it.  You are starting to gain momentum. 

2.  Strengthen your intuition, remember intuition is not a gift, it is a skill. A skill that you practise.  You will walk the unknown to build your self esteem. Your ability to hear your intuition is dependent on your self esteem.

3. Judging others can be a mirror of how you see yourself. Question yourself as to why I am judging that person.  Is this thinking you are carrying value to you? Keep tabs on your private agendas and be upfront. Your self esteem will bloom when there is honesty.

The greatest gift you can give yourself is a healthy self esteem.
The greatest gift you can give to the world is a healthy you.

When genuine self love and self worth are present and alive with us.
We attract love and respect from others.

Carol Tuttle

We see things the way we are

There is bad and good in our life. 
The bad will still happen, but you can perceive it differently.
We do not see things the way they are; we see things the way we are.
We choose our perceptions and we choose our action.

Your self esteem is your spirit in action.
Your self esteem is your self empowerment.
When you lack a sense of self you will have a distorted view of life.
Your perceptions come from your sense of self.

The more you live in the present, the more fulfilling life gets. 
You can survive the unknown.
Courage is not from reading a book about courage.
Courage is action.

You can wish, you can hope and you can dream.
Life begins when you take action.
The present is the best time to choose your best.
It's simple, it's obvious, it is share worthy.

what does unlock your best future mean?

This all started for me when I made the decision to get out of my employment and wow, that was a big step. The job was comfortable, I was good at it, it was secure, I was in a routine that didn't take much effort.  The clues for me to get out and make the shift took me a while to hear, it had to start shouting at me to take action and start seeking. 

I was seeking more for my quality of life and creating more of what I wanted to be and to do.  

For me when I coined the phrase "unlock your best future" it meant that it is already there and waiting for you to make the choice and it means encouraging your sense of self and respecting your unique contribution, to live more in your present and be purposeful about your future.

My best future was to jump right out of my comfortable zone and take some risks. To go on a discovery tour of what is
possible and learn, learn, learn.  I wanted to give more back and in return I knew I would gain so much more.

Remember - Your entire life revolves around CHOICE.

Ok, I admit there are some days, it would just be easier to go back to the way it was. Take that step back away from my best future because it is hard, it is sometimes lonely, you have moments of doubt and what I am learning is not always good to hear - it is for my benefit but my ego doesn't like it.  What has helped is the encouragement from my coaches, my mentors, my friends and my teachers to continue, one step at a time and know that what I am doing is powerful.
I can't keep it to myself, it must be shared as everyone is entitled to seek their best future.

I love the Vincent van Gogh quote
 " When the little voice inside you says you cannot paint, just go ahead and do it anyway"

After some quiet reflective times to work out what it is I want to do. I knew it was important to start my own training business.   I knew from my organisational development background that sending staff to management and leadership development programs that it would end with little return and change in the workplace. 
My belief is that your personal development in the life skill areas, such as overcoming procrastination, self esteem, the challenge of change are the foundations to getting the most out of those programs and see the benefits in the workplace and more importantly to unlock your best future.

By taking that step forward to unlock your best future you believe in your worth to step up and say I want better, I deserve better, I want my future to be fulfilling, exciting and joyous.
More information about my business at

Giving Thanks Every Day

A gratitude journal sample to share with you

GG at Uturbe, South West France
I celebrate and I am very grateful everyday for all the tiny, insignificant, large, grand, beauty, challenges, victory, discoveries, learning, fun...for all & everything that is in my life.

Every Day

A journal of gratitude with 5 new things in it everyday
& includes 1- 2 new things I am grateful for about my set goals every day
& includes 1 new thing about my future every day


I am abundant because everyday I feel creative and come up with more ideas. Today when I woke up I collated my writings and it has spurred me on to do more.  I love to write.

I am grateful for my GG. Today and everyday he makes me laugh. Today it was about how thrilled he was to restore his favourite Roosters beanie. He was very pleased.

I am grateful for my window and my view.  Today the jasmine is blooming and smells wonderful.

I am grateful for the people who have trusted me to speak to their group. Today I had the opportunity to  encourage and inspire.

I am grateful for my success and to see how I am helping others. Today I downloaded music and affirmations and I am excited to listen to them as I know they will be a source of growth for myself and others.

I know this to be certain, just as certain as the wisteria will bloom in Spring

Promoting staff engagement with the WHY question

Alongside industrialisation growth, company growth and competition came the research and theories on motivation and job satisfaction; Herzberg (motivation and hygiene) in the 1960s and Maslow's theory of motivation in the 1950s are two that stand out to me and in the 1990's the term

"Staff Engagement" came about in HR circles and it is still a relatively new concept and a topic that is explored in many "how to " articles on organisational leadership and management.

Ok, This the How & When.. 

It was William Kahn, Boston University professor of organisational behaviour who introduced the term "staff engagement" based on his observation that people have a choice as to how much of themselves they are willing to invest in their jobs.  Kahn discovered that engagement was evident when there is meaning and worth in what they do, their contribution is valued and there is a constant environment where they feel secure and self-confident.

The assumption is employee engagement can never be bought; it must be earned.  Compensation will always be a key component of job satisfaction, it's just not a factor as an every day motivator of engagement.  Companies now include staff engagement as a measurement for improvement, it is analysed to measure the level of trust, identity and commitment that is shown by employees. When staff are engaged in the workplace it is accepted as a good indicator to progress company growth.

We know that improving the staff engagement results in improved business outcomes and profit. 
So, where does staff engagement fit as a priority in a business? 

 It could be said that staff engagement practices are incorporated....but where and when?  Put simply, if I used 3 factors in a business, Purpose, People, Profit and gave each one its due priority, what impact would staff engagement have on business outcomes? 

For example, if the business put Profit first:
  • Profit, Purpose, People

  • Set the targets, work out the purpose and engage the people. A hurried strategy built more on a focus on the competition rather than confidence in the product or service. The leadership is an afterthought and because it is hurried the leadership style sends mixed messages and the workplace is unstable. Staff engagement requires more effort and more possibility of setbacks.

  • Purpose, People, Profit
Set up the purpose and convince the people of the purpose and lead to make the profit. A common management strategy that does have elements of success and the leadership spends a lot of time focused more on winning the staff over. Staff engagement is achievable, though staff investment depends heavily on the leadership focus to purpose and stable environmental factors.
  • People, Purpose, Profit
Engage the people for the purpose and see the profit. The focus is on growing your people, their personal and professional development has the makings of setting purpose with passion and business will grow, along with profit. Staff Engagement has a strong self motivating factor and leadership is dynamic and engaging.

Here is the - WHY question

What if PASSION was added to the staff engagement  and motivation contributing factors as per the research by Kahn, Herzberg, Maslow et al?

The term "passion" in the workplace is gaining momentum.  Passion, a strong emotion that causes you to have a belief and intention and are drawn to the work you want to do.  You do the work because of the passion you have for that job, career or vocation.  

Passion has sustainability and individual ownership. Passion does not require external factors to motivate and passion comes from a clear focus on who you are and what you want to do.   Passion is evident when you ask the WHY question.   

When I finished school ready for my next step into independence and choosing what field to study and what area to work in, WHY? was very important, way more important than, "how" or "how much".  "Why have I chosen to work with this employer?, "Why do I want to work in this field?". 
For some, it stops somewhere in our work life, it gets lost in the things we need to do and have to do and can be forgotten.  For others, it gains maturity and moves on to higher causes. 

Ask yourself WHY. "Why am I in this job?", "Why do I enjoy what I do?", "Why is it important for me to be doing this job?" Passion grows when you know the answers to your Why questions.  Passion is an under-utilised resource for staff engagement.

Commitment vs Apathy

Commitment is the glue that keeps it all together and on the path - a straight  and focused path to what you want to achieve.

Wish – Hope – Want – Commit – Goal – Plan – Achieve

Commitment looks like strong, open, eyes focused and your body is listening, ready and active.

You want to learn, you want to make a difference, you get excited, you have a wider view around you. You push yourself, you motivate yourself and you do this when no-one else is looking.
Do you know these people?  Do you work with these people?

What does apathy look like?

Apathy stops you before you even get started - you are on the roundabout and no intention of getting off.  Apathy will play the victim and hide their true emotions and cop out to "I don't know".

It looks like slumped shoulders, defeated, shuffle rather than stride, head down, all too much, too hard, too tired, give up, lots of sighing, look the other way.
Do you know these people? Do you work with these people?

Apathy can steal away your hopes and dreams and when you see it in the workplace, it will disrupt and frustrate. Apathy is the arch enemy of motivation, killing ideas, suffocating progress.
Yes, apathy is that rotten. You will struggle with improving staff engagement and getting your plans to happen if apathy lives there.

What to do about it.

If only I could jab you with a dose of anti-apathy or call in the anti-apathy busters to clear out the blues but,  IMHO -

  1. When you see apathy, name it:  It comes from a place of hurt and lethargy, apathy is a shield to feelings and lack of direction. See it as a thief of your best.
  2. Jump: Next, take a jump from the apathy cycle at WANT and make the decision to take the line to commitment.  You may think this is out there, but yes, jump, dance, move, step, stride, do any action. Match your thoughts of changing the attitude with action, even better do it to music. It's time to get silly and brave.
  3. Passion squashes apathy every time. Apathy will say, I am not passionate about anything - I do what I have to do and to hell with everyone else.  Apathy tends to love the couch, so get the body heat turned up - add exercise to your day, drink lots of water. When you are at the desk, have a timer and at the minimum every half hour - get up and move. Time to start grooving.
  4. Start with the small wins and celebrate what you have done and how far you have come.  
  5. Pick one thing, one goal and make it happen
  6. Choose one charity and give
  7. Say one encouragement to another person every day
  8. Wow! you have got to #8 you are showing commitment
  9. Go to your employer and say " I want to understand why we are doing ...." 
  10. Go to your employees and win them over. Work is creative and it is interesting and goals do work. Goals set by the employee - concentrate the mind, provide intrinsic motivation, support value & identity and fuel the passion. What better way to remove apathy!


What do your habits say about you?

Victory is a word that has been rumbling around in my head the last few days and you know when there is a rumbling you need to look at it closer, put it under the microscope and find out what is going on.


The dictionary meaning conveys a strong force and is referenced mainly to war or military engagement and the one meaning that relates well for me is the success attained in a contest or struggle over an opponent, obstacle or problem. It is the act of triumphing.

For me then victory is when you don't back away or retreat from the struggle.  You are steadfast in what you promised yourself.  You know there will be obstacles, opponents and problems and when you triumph the victory is all the more sweeter. I needed to look closer at my habits and see if they are serving me well and create good habits that will lead me to victory.

The last post was about taking up the challenge and making the choice.
 A choice between standing down or accepting victory. 
Choice gets easier when good habits are involved.
"the last of human freedoms: the ability to choose one's attitude in a given set of circumstances". Victor Frankl

Stephen Covey and the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People was one of the first great self- help books I read.  I had the audio as well and on my work road trips would listen to each one and get very excited about what I was hearing.  I knew that the lessons I was learning and applying were strengthening my effectiveness and character.
Covey's 7 Habits start with self awareness, self mastery, personal leadership - those private victories and the sequence of growth continues to those public victories - success with people, for example "Think Win-Win", "Seek First to Understand".  

 "Successful people daily weave habits of effectiveness into their lives in order to achieve desired results."
Habits have a strong pull on us. They are consistent and can be conscious or unconscious patterns in our life.  A habit starts out as a thought, turns into an action and when repeated turns into a habit. 
Our habits define what we do, what we feel, what we say or do not say.  It is our habits that reveal our character and plot our destiny.

Would you agree? Habits are worth taking a closer look at.

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Turning Challenges into Victories

You Choose.

I am in a place now where I am very blessed. I feel I am on top of the mountain looking at those challenges below me and can see where there has been victory along the way.

You would not wish a divorce, a loss, an injury or any kind of disappointment on anyone, the truth is where would your life be, if those challenges were not in your life.  You were able to exercise profound moments of truth to choose how you will act.
Without your challenges you would find your circle of comfort would get even smaller, no place for learning, no place to grow and certainly no place to nurture yourself or anyone else for that matter.

The quirky thing is, if you are not kicking out and making the most of your life you will still face challenges because we will invent them anyway.

We are wired to seek out challenges and stretch our thinking, build up our survival muscles. We all want to conquer something in our lives. It is up to you how you want to deal with it.

You Choose.  Victim or Victory

You Choose.  Give Up or Get Up

You Choose.  Lose it or Learn from it

You Choose.  Darkness/Despair or Strength & Willpower

You Choose. Anxiety or Determination

You Choose.  Poverty or Abundance

What I know to be true - the world is heaven and hell and we have a choice to choose which life we want. We are a community, we all want the same - to be acknowledged, to know love, to live with purpose, to see and feel joy and beauty in all creation. My life has a destiny, I am in it now, right now the present I am at my best. The people I meet, the places I go are here to help me for my divine purpose and just as I am here for you.

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I HEART MY CAREER - SIGNED, YOU                             DAMN! GETTING UP IS FUN!